Around this time each year, there’s a strong desire to shop, spend money and buy ‘stuff’ for your friends and family.  Have you ever noticed how easy it is to lose total control of your Christmas budget and overspend?  Ever wondered WHY that is?

As we get closer to the big day, the drive to buy ‘one more gift’ becomes even stronger.  Can you feel it right about now?  And, have you ever found yourself buying totally random gifts just because they were on sale or you didn’t want to go to a party empty-handed?

How about those holiday parties?  Do you find it’s a lot harder to stick with a healthy eating routine or do your best intentions fly out the window?

What you are experiencing right now is the magnetic pull of a carefully crafted ENVIRONMENT.  Next year, I’m writing a series of articles on this topic (weekly, in Inner Circle) since I find it so totally fascinating and critical for those of you wishing to feel more centered and accomplished.

When you’re over-spending or over-shopping, do you feel centered?  NOPE.  In fact, it’s almost as though you’re hypnotized or mindlessly ignoring a budget, debt removal goals or the best of intentions to *not* succumb to the consumerism of Christmas.

We all know how tough it is to walk away from sugary goodies or what I call ‘low energy foods’.  For me, it’s sugar…for you, it could be alcohol, bread or anything that drags you down.

It takes a tremendous amount of discipline, focus and awareness to *not* get sucked into the vortex of over-shopping or eating poorly right about now.  I challenge you to walk through the mall in the next day or so and notice how you FEEL.  Do the same thing at a holiday party.  It’s tough to say ‘no’ to foods you know are bad for you, right? 

Why is that?

You see, merchants have a very clear agenda.  They want your money.  They want you to shop with them.  They need to reach their Christmas-sales goals.  So, they pull out all of the stops….lull you into a hypnotic state with cheery holiday tunes…...display merchandise in an attractive way…..and display ‘holiday sale signs’ to create a sense of urgency in your mind about making the purchase TODAY.

And, holiday hostesses want you to feel cared for and comforted by all of the goodies they’re providing. Nothing’s worse than a party without food, right?  However, if you’re on a diet, those parties are like being an alcoholic walking into a bar.  It’s a temptation that’s too strong to deny for many people. 

Hey, none of this is evil.  It’s their right to do everything they can to push their agenda (getting you to buy or attempting to throw a successful party with lots of treats to enjoy).  YOUR job is to be clear about YOUR agenda, however.

So, here’s my beef and what I’m doing about it next year….

What I see in the world right now is a lot of AGENDAS surrounding you. More so than ever!  Companies want to sell you things.  Your boss wants you to work harder or longer hours.  Even friends and family want something from you….your time, attention and energy. 

Your friends and family have an agenda?  Did I REALLY say that?

Well, yes.  Let’s face it, we’re in the greatest self-expression explosion of all time.  There are hundreds of virtual taps on your shoulder each day.  There’s twittering, facebooking, texting, emailing, you-tube-ing, you name it.  Everyone wants an audience and it is fun and inspiring to peruse vacation photos, read updates or hear juicy news.  It’s also time consuming.

Again, none of this is evil or mean-spirited.  It just IS.  It’s a reality of the world we live in right now. The demand for your time, energy and attention is HUGE right now.  Everyone wants a piece of you.

What is YOUR agenda, though.

What do YOU want your life to be about?

While you’re checking out your friends’ latest excursion photos, are you making time to go on YOUR adventure?

We’re living in overwhelming AND exciting times.  There are countless options, choices, and directions you could take.  If you float through your day unaware of YOUR agenda or unclear about YOUR goals, it’s WAY too easy to succumb to someone else’s agenda.

That’s how and why people overspend, eat the wrong foods for their body, waste time during the day, work way too many hours, procrastinate or can’t seem to finish (or begin) important projects or goals.

When you live this way, you are easy prey for someone else and their agenda. 

The only way through this maze with grace and ease is to make sure you’re CLEAR, FOCUSED and GROUNDED first.  Then, it becomes much easier to say ‘no, thank you’ to over-spending, eating low-energy foods, working un-godly hours for your boss instead of enjoying a personal life, wasting time with meaningless tasks or anything else that gets in the way of you living your best life.

It’s time to say ENOUGH.  Seriously, don’t you want your life back?

This next part may amuse you….if you’ve been paying attention to what I’ve said thus far.

OK, here’s MY agenda.  Yes, I do have one.

I want to teach you how to reclaim your life by being much more mindful of the ‘environments’ you live in.  More importantly, I want you to take charge of those environments and re-design them so it’s much easier to remain centered and faithful to your goals.

For example, even though everyone and their dog is promoting their businesses on facebook or twitter, I am NOT.  I may change my mind about it at some point, but for now I’m NOT.  You see, I choose not to since I find it a big time drain.  Yes, I have a personal facebook page but that’s enough for me.  If I had a business page, I’d feel compelled to interact a lot with people (I don’t like ignoring others when they reach out to me.) It would bug me to have a half a&* site that’s unattended. And, I don’t feel it’s right to secretly delegate this task to my assistant since people would expect to interact with me personally.  So, I don’t do it at all.  And, I know how important it is to manage my time effectively. That’s how I remain happy and fulfilled.  BALANCED.

I do know others are much better at ‘facebooking’ than I am and it’s not a time drain for them. For ME, it is, so I don’t do it.  Fortunately, I’ve been able to attract people through good old word of mouth referrals from happy clients.  Sure, it might be nice to have MORE business from facebook, but how much is ‘enough’ and do I want to spend the time over-working anyway? 

Instead, I choose to focus on my vision of a simple, balanced and successful life….rather than being swayed by our culture’s hunger for abundance (another ‘environment’) or mind set of ‘more is better’.  For me, ‘enough’ is just right.  For me, ‘enough’ allows for the highest quality of service I can provide without turning into the Wal-Mart of coaching.  It also affords me the balanced life I truly enjoy.

Facebook and Twitter are ‘environments’.  They’re little worlds you live in while you’re ‘there’ online.  Is it a place you enjoy?  If so, go for it!  Or, is it a time drain for you or does it feel like an obligation?  Just something to think about so you can be mindful of your decision to be involved or not.  Does it serve your highest goals or not?  Again, I’m all for it if you love it.  And, yes, I know my personal opinion is very unpopular on this subject.  That’s EXACTLY what it takes to be in command of your life, however.  You’ll have to make some unpopular decisions that are right for YOU, even if other people don’t agree or understand. Again, it’s YOUR agenda or someone else’s.  Which do you want?

Here’s another example:  Where you eat lunch is another ‘environment’.  Do you go to the company cafeteria since it’s easy access or all of your buddies enjoy going?  Does their food align with your fitness goals?  Is there another lunch spot that would make it much easier for you to reach your health and fitness goals?  Personally, I go to Whole Foods many days for lunch.  It’s very cafeteria-esque with the food bar but the food choices are MUCH healthier than your typical company cafe.  See how one small tweak in environment could make a world of difference with an important goal? 

What if you made several KEY tweaks to the environments you choose to live in? What would happen to your life?

Isn’t this stuff FASCINATING?  Can you see how living a quality life in these times has everything to do with what’s around you and where you place yourself?

You live in at least 20 key environments each day!  Did you know that?  Can you name them?

Do those environments have a hold on YOU or are they designed to lift you up and support you?

That’s what we’ll explore next year in Inner Circle.

In addition to discovering how to carefully design your key environments as ‘thrive zones’ for you, I also want you to learn how to be totally centered and on-point in any environment….even your favorite store (with a major sale) days before Christmas!  Or, a holiday party with all of your vices displayed on doilies and silver trays.

So, why do I care enough to write about this?

You see, years ago, I became a coach after having an epiphany during rush-hour traffic.  As I looked around, I noticed how most people looked really unhappy during their drive home.  That struck me as sad and wrong.  After a day’s work, wouldn’t you want to feel jazzed and happy?  In my mind, that’s how things ought to be, so I spent the first 10 years coaching people to redesign their careers and lives.

Now, I’m in the midst of another epiphany.  What I see NOW are people at the mercy of their environments.  So, they eat junk/fast food (because it’s everywhere), get into debt (since shopping is a national past-time), work too much (due to lean times and companies requiring more from workers), fritter away countless hours each week (over-consuming as an audience member in online gossip/tabloids or the self-expression/social media explosion) and lose balance along the way. 

You CAN have the experience you want to have in this lifetime.  It all begins with awareness and the courage to actively create the life (and environments) you want and need to thrive.

That’s my speech for the day!  Now, go enjoy your holidays and I’ll ‘see’ you in 2011.

Your coach,